“I wasn’t willing to go to Him,” 17-year-old Tolulope Oluwafemi emphasizes. What do you do when life gets rough and your only sense of security leads to insecurity? What do you do when your desires become more tasteful than the promise of eternal life? 

“I didn’t have an issue with it, I’m just the only girl in my class that goes to church on Saturdays.” Tolu shares as she grew up in a Seventh-Day Adventist Christian household. She loved to spend most of her Saturdays in the church building, running around with her friends. Before truly getting to know Christ, Tolu explained her relationship with God to be ‘ok.’ Her parents believed in it, so she had to. In 2020, Tolu got baptized at the age of 13. She did not know the true meaning of being a christian. She did not know what she was getting into before being dipped into the Holy Water. “I was scared of going to hell.” She admits; christian TikTok had installed fear into her innocent heart, practically giving her two choices: Hell or baptism. 

The older Tolu got, the more her trials became unbearable. Most Christians would tell you to place it before the feet of Jesus. Let Him take care of it. But, Tolu couldn’t. She didn’t want to. “A couple weeks, months, years…” She stopped taking the first step to pursue a relationship with God. She didn’t read her bible. She didn’t pray. She never truly paid attention during church services. She had fully strayed away from God at this point. 

Many Christians have created an image for themselves as hateful. Not full of love. The complete opposite of Jesus. They twist the word of God, spew hate and lies, but call it love. “How do you minister the Gospel to people in that way?” This question Tolu asked directed towards Seventh-Day Adventist, but also can be directed towards all Christians. How can one emphasize the importance of a relationship with Jesus, but send others to Hell for the same sin they struggle with behind closed doors? 

“Enough is enough. I need to actually take this seriously,” Tolu scolded herself one random day. After living in constant fear of Hell and resentment towards the church, she takes matters into her own hands. She began to make pursuing Jesus a habit. She started to pray again, read her Bible more and actually spend time with God without placing Him on the back burner. 

She refused to let imperfect human beings send her to hell. 

15-year-old Martin Obura was born into a Christian household, but also, a house of violence. His father was abusive; he would constantly hurt not only Martin’s mother, but his older brother and himself. “I had too much going on. I couldn’t focus on God.” He explained. His relationship with God was typically one-sided—though he lived in a christian household, he didn’t know how to live for God. For months, he stopped praying to God. He thought that his belief in Jesus was enough for him to make it into Heaven. A common misconception Christians stumble upon. 

At the ripe age of 8, Martin began to struggle with pornography. As he got older, he started to realize how bad his addiction was. He wanted to pursue God, but he couldn’t stop falling back into the trap. He couldn’t understand why he couldn’t let go of it. Sure, dopamine plays a huge role in this but he was calling on the name of Jesus. “Why couldn’t He save me?” Martin constantly asked himself that question.

He wanted that commitment. He wanted to turn away from his sinful lifestyle, but he could not do it alone. He recognized he wasn’t strong enough and needed something greater than himself to be free from those shackles. Martin began to surround himself with other Christians, but he explained that when he was open about his addiction, he would get laughed at. But, he did not let that stop him from actively searching for freedom from sin. 

“I was in a wilderness season. No friends. Just me and God.” He was set apart. God heard his cries. During his wilderness season, he was constantly changing. He wanted to portray that he was actually a christian; he wanted to reap the love of Jesus to the people around him. 

Martin and Tolu, two teenagers who are actively searching for the love of Jesus Christ in a world full of distractions. When speaking with the two of them, I gained knowledge about what it truly meant to be a christian. They are not perfect. They still slip up. They still struggle. But even during their trials and tribulations, they are still human and they know that God is good. 

You have to be able to ask yourself: “Is it worth it coming back to Him? How important is God to you? Why is He important enough that you consider running back to Him?”

“Dive full in.” Martin concludes. You never know if you don’t try.